A Cold Fog

When my desire to feel a man’s finger trace my spine,

to feel his lips on mine, to bring him pleasure in return –

when this desire goes unfulfilled,

the act of self-pleasure hangs like a cold fog on my heart.

I know that I could find release in a shadowed place

with whatever randy man I can find.

But this does nothing to lift the fog and brings its own disappointment

in the deeper need going once again unmet.

I tire of putting on a bright face to the lonely ache and

trying to dress up desire in the designer clothes of diversionary activity.

As I’ve said before I don’t feel needy in the sense of completion.

I am complete.

I am beautiful.

I am worthy of deep, pungent, wild, loving desire.

Not really solace or reassurance.

But I do know:  soon.

He will appear, and he will be drawn to trace and nibble.

On me, here, now.

For a deep dive, begin with What is Spiritual Practice?

Headshot of Cheryl Marlene, Spiritual Guide in the Akashic Records

Cheryl Marlene, Akashic Mystic and the world’s authority on the Akashic Records, is unafraid of the tough, the raw, and the real aspects of doing deep work. She is the Founder of the Akashic Records School, conducts Akashic Record Readings and teaches students from around the world to access the Akashic Records through her signature program ZENITH, and her bestselling book Akashic Records Masterclass. In the field of consciousness, she is known as a futurist, innovator, and master teacher who delivers life-changing lessons with warmth and humor. Her exploration takes her to the cutting edge: bringing the future to you today, to help prepare you for what you will need tomorrow.