Challenging the Spitballs of Life by Cheryl Marlene

Challenging the Spitballs of Life

Love Worthy Lesson #6

Life is not all rainbows and unicorns. Nope!

On a regular basis, life rolls out the unexpected, the painful, the disgusting, and the frightening. That’s just on the inside.

On the outside is everyone else having their experience being pushed to the edge and then beyond their ability to cope.

You get hurt. You feel your sense of safety is challenged if not broken. Your trust in yourself may break down. Lordy! Ducking each lob, shifting, pulling back, trying to avoid the spitballs and the ice balls and possible head-on collisions.

In the barrage, the biggest challenge is to your heart. In the face of fear and attack, its natural that your heart wants to slam the doors and find its secret safe room. Pulled back, out of the line of fire can feel like the best solution. The problem is that whatever made your heart beat a hasty retreat is till plugging up the works.

The best way to release fear is not to just back away. The only way to release is to release, let go. Hiding, running away, ignoring, denying — these might give you a chance to catch your breath, but in the end don’t accomplish the goal of release.

The only way to release is to do the work. The only way to counter fear is to look it in the face and see what it wants to dump on you. When you run away, you run with the load dumped into your tenderest spot — your heart.

When you stand and challenge, you create strength and resiliency. You begin to shift the lyrics of your life and create new music to support your journey. Duck and run are left in the past. Trust and truth fuel your choices.

This doesn’t mean that SH*T doesn’t happen — because it will. Instead, you will give yourself a fighting chance and no longer let your heart be a dumping ground for the painful, disrespectful flotsam of the world.

Standing up to SH*T is hard and requires practice. Also a bit of a catch-22 because to stand up you need to feel confidence in your heart. To feel confidence, you need to release prior pain to have the strength to stand up.

The release and open process is not a one-time, giant step, fix-it moment. Instead its baby steps to allow the various bits to soften and move on. As the bits move one, you recover your heart and build the strength and resiliency needed when the world tosses another spitball your way.

Give yourself the opportunity to consider your reaction to fear by asking yourself this question:

Why do I run in the face of fear?

The wise person asks questions.

My father has said this to me since I was young child just learning to read.

When you ask a question, you are giving yourself the opportunity to learn.

Learning is life. Learn always. Open to learn.

How? Simple: ask questions!

Use the question to learn.

Ask. Tune in. Follow flow. Ponder and reflect.

The Weekly Question offers you a chance to step back and learn about yourself.  For example, you may use the question as part of a meditation practice or while taking a mindful walk.  Cheryl highly recommends reflection. Reflection is a method of focused thought and is a great way to work with any question.  Here’s an article describing the Three Steps of Reflection.